Standing Tall In The Grove

Friends, I've been on my knees a lot over the past few weeks. It seems the storms have rolled in. Such a contrast to my last blog post three months ago in May. I see now that God has been preparing me. Now, I have to put my trust and faith into action. Not just say it, but do it. Fully trust. Isaiah 40:28-29

Several weeks ago, I found out that my closest friend here in Iowa is moving to a new city 570 miles away. Oh the initial sting and then the ache that started off as a slow throb has now started to pound, harder and harder, as moving day has gotten closer and closer. 

Tiffany

Our relationship has been so easy. She moved here to Iowa a year after I moved and we met on a playdate at the park with our boys. It turned out, she also lived in my neighborhood. We are the same age. She was the newbie and I could relate. She was new as a stay-at-home mom and I could relate. Navigating the change from the corporate world to being at home with a preschooler full time brings some challenges and I could relate. She was finding her way in a new town and I could relate. God knew I longed for a deeper connection and not just an on-the-surface type friendship. Over the last two years, our boys have gotten really close. We've helped each other out in so many ways and usually spend several days a week together. She has been the late night phone call when things have gotten messy in my life now and then. She always shows up with a smile and often a small gift to brighten up my day. She is so very thoughtful. She has the gift of service and hospitality and is always the life of the many themed parties she throws for every single holiday and occasion; so full of energy. Quite frankly, she is hard to keep up with. She is strong, fiercely vocal about injustice and an advocate for those who are unable to fight for themselves. She has a benevolent heart and submerges herself in cultures of all kinds. She always sees the good in others. Did I mention that she single handedly orchestrated a group of women from our neighborhood to get together and write out "happiness"notes to be hung throughout the trees in our neighborhood? We have similar parenting styles and so that has just made it even easier. I love her boys and she loves mine. She loves my other friends because I love them and I love hers because she loves them. Our families vacationed together. Our husbands have a mutual love of all things sports and we just simply have spent a lot of time doing life together over the last two years.  It all has just seemed to flow so perfectly.

Tiffany & Me

Two weeks ago, as I was anticipating her move and thinking about how different my life will be without her here, I was brought to my knees over a situation with one of my children. As a mother, it gripped me and I immediately called on my closest friends for support. I was desperate. Within 10 minutes or so, they were all at my house including Tiffany; in the middle of the day on a random Thursday. I have never in my life, felt so loved and cared for. I am overwhelmed by how much God loves me through the people that He has placed in my life. Again, little did I know how God had been preparing me for more storms ahead. That very day when Tiffany showed up with the others, she had just left the radiology/imaging center where she had had her first mammogram. Oh the joys of turning 40, we all joked. It happened to be one of the things on her list of things to do before leaving Iowa. Ever the optimist and lively person that she is, her jokes brought such laughter to the situation and we dried up our tears. It was just what we needed to break up the intensity of why we were all together at that moment on my back porch that day.

So flash forward two weeks. As Tiffany's friends started coming together, all with their special talents and mutual love for her, some helping out with the kids and the animals, others bringing gifts and scrambling for time to soak up the last bit of sunshine that is Tiffany; the movers showed up. And just like that, it became reality. She really is leaving. I was there at her house watching the movers carefully pack her belongings and having my very own pity party over her leaving, when Tiffany's phone rang. It was the doctor from radiology where after she had her initial mammogram, had also gone back in for a biopsy. But, Tiffany, anticipating only common calcifications had gone on about the planning of her move, busy just like a bee, buzzing around here and there, staying positive and smiling as usual. The moment the phone rang, it became silent and as she turned to look at me with the phone to her ear, I knew. A million things went through my head along with a range of emotions that I can't put into words. As another friend of Tiffany's showed up to hear the news, I didn't know what I was supposed to be doing. I wanted to be strong, but I wanted to cry, I wanted to hold her up and I was angry at myself because I wasn't on my A game. I had been partying in my own pity over her leaving and over the hardest days of parenting I have had with my daughter yet. Emotional me just wanted to fall to my knees. So... that's what I did. I prayed. I knew how to do this because I have watched some amazing women in my life here in Iowa pray for each other and for others during times of joy and thanksgiving and during times of profound loss and sadness. I knew, because just two weeks before, when I called on my closest friends during a dark moment, they came to my side and took the time to pray for me and with me. The calm that fell over me gave me a deep sense of well-being and I was reminded again that God's promises are true; that the Spirit helps us in our weakness.

God showed up BIG in other ways on Tiffany's moving day too. The other friend that showed up, she was the level-headed one. She immediately started asking questions, got on the phone with some of her resources and immediately brought calm to the situation. She is gifted in problem-solving and logic. My head was swimming with questions like, "Who will be there in this new city to walk through this with her? How will she make it through this gigantic move with this news added to it?" I was scared but I tried not to show it. I was so struck by the way this other friend of hers handled herself and I could see that in that moment, God had orchestrated her presence there that day as well.

Since the phone call, I've been thinking about just how much we are all intertwined together and how God has it all planned out that way; how He prepares each and every one of us for what's to come. I've watched hundreds of people comment on Tiffany's announcement on her Facebook page about this new fight. People from all of over the map who have walked with Tiffany in other tough seasons of her life. People whose lives Tiffany has also touched along the way. 

The coming together of these women/people to bring support and encouragement reminds me of the meaning of the word Grove that was described to me a few years ago while I was among a large group of women. 

Grove: a small orchard of fruit-bearing trees

We think of a grove as a place to gather together and grow; to evolve through the seasons of change. When the wind blows, we will stand together just like a grove of trees. Together we can protect each other. In protecting each other with God at the center, we will each grow stronger. When we are strong, we will then be able to bear fruit. There must be rain, for us to grow. John 15:5


The word I've been seeing over and over from others to describe Tiffany is STRONG. She is strong. She's full of hope and she's ready for the fight. She embodies the fruit of the Spirit. Who am I to be having a pity party? She is showing me just what Faith and Hope are all about. God has been preparing all of us. We need each other, friends. It's the way God meant it to be. 1 Corinthians 12:12-26 God created us for a purpose; each with our own set of gifts and talents. John 15:13-17 I cannot describe how blessed I feel in receiving my own countless messages and phone calls from friends, some of whom don't even know Tiffany but they know me, they heard the news and they know how much I love her.

I am thankful for God's promises. I cling to His word for comfort. Romans 15:4  As I stood in the yard today with another friend, tearfully blowing kisses and waving goodbye, I couldn't help but think about this passage.

Joshua 1:19

Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.”

I have full trust that God will bring new friends to Tiffany in her new town, who will love and embrace her, just like each of us here in Iowa and all over the map have loved and embraced her. I choose to put my faith and hope in our Creator. The one who has gone before us. The one whose Mighty hand is strong enough to move mountains and the one who is always right on time. He will supply Tiffany with her needs Philippians 4:19 and the rest of us will be there to encourage her and lift her up along the way; standing together, like a grove of trees; protecting each other from the storm; uplifted by our Heavenly Father and pouring out the fruit of the Spirit just as we are called to do.

It's time to do it, not just say it. I fully trust you, Father God. You will not delay. You're my refuge and strength... always. Psalm 119:114 I know that You are going to stretch us and grow us during this season and I pray that we will bring honor to You, in what we say, how we act and what we think and through our deep desire to know You more. Psalm 86:12

Thank you for sprinkling sunshine in my life through this dear friend you brought to me with love.

I encourage you to check out Tiffany's blog here:
stilettos2slippers
I have no doubt she will encourage and uplift you with her "Fight Like A Girl" attitude and her
 "Little Bits of Happy".

Color Run 2013